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This week, his brother, the Duke of Cambridge, has gone on to warn in an interview that keeping a stiff upper lip should not be at the expense of your health. More than 25 years since Paul Gascoignes famous tears during the 1990 World Cup made him a national hero, havent we moved on from this buttoned-up stereotype? From Barack Obama crying over the death of children at Sandy Hook to Vladimir Putin shedding tears at a victory rally , these days even world leaders are unafraid to show their emotions. Yet, as consultant clinical psychologist Sally Austen points out, such public weeping invariably takes the form of tidy tears. The emotion we accept, or even encourage, in public figures is still controlled. To be with someone who is crying snot and choking on their sadness takes a level of courage for which we might not yet be ready, she says. The fears are underpinned by negative automatic thoughts; powerful, often unexamined thoughts that affect the choices we make, often without us even noticing. This leads us to worry that, If I start crying I will never stop or, If I cry my colleagues will lose all respect for me, and even, I cant cry because I need to look after everyone else. visit this pageThis can come at a cost. People who might be classed as emotionally strong the stiff upper lipped are more likely to end up with depression or PTSD than those who recognise their need to express their feelings, she says.
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